12 YEARS

I cant believe it's 12 years already! Ugh.
I can, actually. It was just being dramatic. 

Well. 12 years *sigh*
I'm surprised I can survive this long. Haha.

I can remember every hours that happened in 25 April 2000.
The worst day EVER in my life.

That one day was enough to make me paranoid of losing EVERYTHING in my life since.
That one day was enough to make me a stronger girl than any I could imagine before.

I am glad I never gave up. Because I'm survive this far.

I still wish I could have a time turner.
Even I couldnt stop death to take my Dad.
I would like to use it to keep my little self company.

To tell her that things WOULD REALLY GO ALRIGHT.
To courage her to be stronger because there is really a HAPPINESS after a pain.
To cheer her to work hard because NOT A SINGLE FIGHT WOULD BE WORTHLESS.
To remind her to keep going when she thought she had enough she should have given up.
To hug her when she cried because she thought she was a useless space and didnt know what she should did.
And, to show her that I would always be there for her. Your first and truly bestfriend is yourself. If only you could believe that :)

I really have no idea if my dad is proud of me or not right now.
I didnt do anything for a bad purpose.
So I assume he feels good for that xD

I love you, Dad.
20 years ago, 12 years ago, and today.
I promise I will always love you with all of my heart until like, forever. If forever does really exist.
I'll show you every second you spent for me was really worth it.


Love,

Me